It's a story of a girl living in France.
She's an average girl.
She isn't fat but she's not skinny.
She's not ugly but not beautiful either.
Her family isn't unhappy. Her parents are happy. Her sister is happy. Her friends are happy.
She's got so many minor health issues she can't even count them on her fingers.
She doesn't success in school much, doesn't really know what to do with her life, doesn't draw like an artist, she doesn't model like a 3dartist, she isn't even a singer worth paying for.
She speaks a few languages, not perfectly.
She isn't excellent anywhere.
She isn't crappy anywhere either though.
She doesn't deserve the fame and doesn't especially do so bad.
She doesn't make especially excellent works, no matter how hard she tries.
She likes befriending people from all around the world, yet she knows very well she talks too much.
She doesn't like modern fashion and her tastes are random in a lot of things.
She crumbles of terror mixed with bliss when talking to persons she looks up to.
She prefers gaming all weekend rather than going out with her friends.
She's just an average girl.
Yet as plain as her life sounds it slowly sinks into darker events.
Persons around her die.
Her grades are poor.
She realizes she's not happy.
She hates her major with a passion and suddenly wants to change.
Change to become happy.
She looks at new paths, new schools.
She changes her glasses, cuts her hair and loses 2 kilos.
She yearns for something new. She's found something to truly achieve.
She decides to get off her lazy plain life and work.
And then she works.
Her health goes down slowly, her grades get worse and worse, but she doesn't care.
She's somehow happy. She's working to achieve something she wants.
She faints only to get up again and say "I'm okay."
She tells others not to worry.
Everything is shady and unsteady under her feet but she doesn't look.
For once she tries her best.
But the best is never enough.
And her body breaks in the end.
She blames others.
Yet she wishes they'd seen earlier how miserable she's become.
And she blames herself.
And her mind breaks too.
She can't take up anymore and she hates herself.
She hates that average girl.
Who isn't excellent in anything and isn't even able to achieve a single change.
She hates the girl who broke under her own flaws.
She hates that girl that now lies in apathy on a hospital bed, tired and yet smiling and lying "I'm okay."
She hates that smile.
So she breaks it.
She breaks it all.
She lets go.
And she's in chaos. And she's in peace.
She's at the bottom and can't go lower.
So she looks up and then she sees.
The faces of people crying for her.
Crying because they were worried.
The faces of people worried about her.
She sees the hands reaching out to her but she can't grab any of them.
Because she's just a miserable average girl.
A girl who can't achieve even what's she's been hard-working for.
She sits at the bottom of her well and cries along, wishing she was gone.
Then she goes silent because she hears the people crying above.
So she dries her tears, stands up from the bottom.
Her body's getting lighter and she can drag herself higher.
She climbs out towards the people above.
She sees the new paths she could'nt see from above.
And she smiles faintly. She's happy.
She's so happy.
Happy for the care she's receiving.
Happy for the hands reaching out to her help.
But she fakes that smile.
She's so sorry.
Sorry for the tears she sees on others' faces.
Sorry for the girl she left to die in the well.
Her plea of "I'm so sorry. I'll try again."
Dying with and changing into
"I'm alive. I love you too."
The girl sits from her hospital bed behind her old machine friend
She can't look back, but now's her new chance
And she starts typing
"It's a story of a girl living in France..."
I did not commit suicide, I'd never ever do that to my family.
I am sorry I can't thank every single one of you enough for all the comments.
I received so much over the past 48hours every single thing is a gift and I treasure them.
I don't believe in God, but bless you all.
Bless you Kyo for showing me so much love. So much love I'm choking.
That dying girl in the well still doesn't think she deserves all of it but...